An orphaned adult

Hindustan Pilkington Glass Works Limited was a premiere glass manufacturing company situated in Asansol. In the 1970’s it was probably the best Glass manufacturing company in India. From there the trade union problem raised its head and the factory shut down in 1980. Over 2000 employees lost their jobs all of a sudden. My father was also one of them. From having a pretty decent lifestyle our family fell under a pall of gloom. The factory never reopened after that and even after many years of struggle my father and his colleagues never got their PF dues also.

With a young family to feed and hardly any savings, my father had to rebuild his career from scratch. I had already got admission to St. Vincent’s High & Technical School at that time. People living in and around Asansol would know that it was one and still is one of the premier schools of Asansol. My father’s paternal property was at Howrah and many of our relatives advised him to leave Asansol and come back to Howrah so that he can save on the rent and associated expenses. Also those days my Grand Mother was alive and we were a joint family so the expenses would have been less.

He didn’t budge and the only reason for him to not leave Asansol was for my studies. He knew that I have got an opportunity to study in one of the best schools and getting admission to a similar school at Kolkata could be difficult. He lived his life on his own terms and he didn’t have any ego when it came to work. Within one week, he started a milk booth sitting at the doorstep of our house. He could afford only 60 bottles of milk and each sale would give him 25 Paisa profit. Selling 60 bottles would give him Rs. 15 profit per day and that’s how he started. There were days in the first couple of months when we would have only Potato curry and rice for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. There were days when my parents gave me the Potatoes and they had the curry. We couldn’t afford anything else. On Sundays, our very kind-hearted neighbour used to send mutton curry for me. That was my only non-veg dish and this continued for about a year till my father was ready to move to the next step.

In between, there was no compromise with my studies. My school continued as before. I was in Class 1 and I could feel my friends were far better off than me and my mother used to tell me, “don’t worry, study hard and you will get all the things that you want one day”. 

Every day the ice cream vendor used to stand outside the school gate and my friends used to have those stick ice creams. One day I asked my mother, please give me 50 paise, I want to have ice cream. My mother didn’t give me. I didn’t have the maturity to understand the reason behind it. But one day, I saw a 50 paisa coin on the table. With both my parents not anywhere near, I pocketed the coin and left for school. That day I had my first stick ice cream. When I came back, I was asked if I had taken any 50 paisa coin, I didn’t understand how could they know about one 50 paisa coin. Later I realised that my father maintained a diary where he kept a note of each paisa so he knew that there is a shortage of a coin and after that realised he had kept the coin on the table which went missing. I admitted that I took it to have ice cream. Got a royal thrashing from my father and I realised how poor we were financially. 

Anyways, with some profit coming from selling the milk bottles and the free time that my father had in the evenings, he thought of starting a shop. One of my maternal uncles was holding a top position at J Thomas & Co and he helped my father to get a few boxes of tea every quarter. My father was one of the 13 siblings and the advantage of a big family meant many of his brothers and sisters pooled in money to get him the seed capital to start the tea business. Once every 3 months, he used to go to Siliguri and get tea boxes which he then sold from a small shop which he took for rent. 

Things started looking up and after a couple of years, he started Order-Supply business to local Asansol Market where he used to supply plastic packets. This venture helped him increase his profit and he became a vendor at IISCO later on where he supplied stationery and electrical goods.

By that time I was in class 6 and our lifestyles had significantly improved. My father didn’t believe in taking debt which meant he was never able to scale his business and it meant he never became a big enough player in the market. But, he was happy because he always said that “I do not owe money to anyone – so I get a good night’s sleep”. This he maintained throughout his life. 

Just before Glass Factory closed down he had booked a Maruti Car which he couldn’t take delivery of, due to financial issues. By the time his business improved, he could have gone for a car taking a loan, but instead bought a scooter which he kept with him till we left Asansol in 2014. He finally got himself a Maruti Car in 2014 with full cash keeping his motto of never taking debt.

We used to live in a rented house where I spent my entire childhood. Finally, in 1991, he bought a piece of land and he built his own house which started in 1992 and finished in 1993. Once again nothing on debt so it took more than 14 months for him to build the house.

My mother was a typical housewife with visible tension written all over her face. If I was late for even 10 minutes she would be at the doorstep. As she left for the heavenly abode yesterday, I was left thinking who will wait for me in the way she did throughout my life. It was so painful over the last few months as she kept fighting Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s and finally stopped recognizing me. From the days she can’t have food without meeting me at least once a day to a situation where she didn’t even know who I was. A journey that is so difficult to fathom.

My father had just finished building the house when my grandmother passed away and I finished my class 12. I couldn’t get through the West Bengal joint entrance exams but a few of my friends were going to Bangalore so I gave the CET (Common Entrance Test to get admitted to Engineering college in Karnataka) and got admission there. My father was not ready for such steep fees because he couldn’t afford it then. But he somehow managed and as I spent the best days of my life in Bangalore he kept struggling to keep us afloat. He ensured that I keep getting my basic things in Bangalore though it was extremely difficult for him financially. He could not get our 1st floor of the house completed because of my studies. We finally finished the house in 2006 when I started working in Kolkata after coming back from Bangalore.

In 2014 when he realised that it would get very difficult for me to maintain a property in Asansol because I hardly go to that place he decided to sell off the property. The day we were coming back from Asansol one of our neighbours came and told us, “If Satya (truth) leaves us how will we survive?” (My father’s name was Satyandra Nath Sinha) – that’s the kind of person he was – never compromised on the values and ethics and was happy with what he had. People who have seen his struggle through the 1980s know how he rebuilt his career from scratch. 

After coming back to Kolkata he never visited Asansol again but one of his earlier dreams of owning a car was realised when he bought a Maruti Alto car in 2014 with full cash. He made me promise that I won’t sell this car until his grandson drives it. Still, 2 years to go for Neel to get a driver’s license but I will definitely make sure that the wish is fulfilled.

In 2016 as my father was diagnosed with a Chronic Kidney ailment, parallelly my mother was also diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease with signs of Alzheimer’s. It was a big struggle with my father often telling me that my mother should leave us early because she is mentally tuned to be too dependent on him. I kept telling him not to think of things that he just cannot control. Even during his last few days at Fortis Hospital, he kept telling me the same thing.

God has his own plans!

My father left for heavenly abode on 21st January 2019. My mother’s health kept deteriorating and she took the bed in May 2019 and from there on it was a daily struggle and in between this pandemic of Covid-19 her ailment took a severe turn and she stopped recognizing me for the last 2 months. Every day over the last few weeks we lived in fear as no doctor was ready to visit the house. Finally, the struggle and her fight ended on 9th August 2020 as my mother breathed last leaving me orphaned forever. Getting a doctor to visit and certify her death was extremely difficult. Once again the school for which my father didn’t leave Asansol in the 1980s came to my rescue as my dear senior Dr. Jayabrata Sen Sharma came down to certify her death.

As an adult orphan when I look back, I can only see the good things that both my parents gave me. I wouldn’t have had such a great school life without their sacrifices. My best days were spent in Bangalore and once again it was not possible without their sacrifices. Both times my parents went above their means to try and give me a good life because their entire life went in trying to make me happy. 

How good a son was I? 

I don’t know but I did my best within my capacity. I am nowhere close to my father’s values when it comes to financial management but I hope to get better. And I am very sure my father would have seen from above that the girl whom he completely disapproved of (I married Sushma without my parent’s approval) took very good care of my mother and left no stone unturned to keep her as happy as possible. Finally, she couldn’t succeed as Alzheimer’s took full control but she did her best.

Stay happy where ever you are and keep showering your blessings as I begin a life without you.

Om Shanti!

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