Creativity needs collaboration.
But Covid-19 has created a massive challenge in this aspect.
Let’s think of the good part.
But amidst all this what’s missed is the sheer camaraderie.
Gone are the days when people used to think that your best friends by default always used to be from school or college days. As the last couple of decades has shown us that best of friends can come from amongst your colleagues too.
But is that camaraderie possible in the remote work environment?
Absolutely not.
Whatever one-to-one you have with your colleagues or have tea-break sessions over Google Meet – it can never replace physical interactions. Relationships grow when you have unabridged discussions over a beer or a cup of coffee.
When relationships evolve, your meetings get more interesting. You get more transparent feedback. You improve the trust factor.
This is distinctly not possible in a remote environment. And this leads to a scenario where collaboration reduces and it takes a toll on your creative output.
What we are increasingly seeing today is that people are spending way too much time on video meetings but the output is lackluster because there’s a fatigue that’s setting in with too many video calls. Not everyone is comfortable talking endlessly or listening endlessly. People lose focus and when you lose focus your creativity reduces. Mistakes creep in and another set of video calls follow. This is a vicious circle.
First and foremost we need to realise that the old normal won’t be back in a jiffy. What the latest strain of Covid-19 shows is that we have to learn to live with the virus forever. You can’t control it. You just try to be safe as much as possible but accept this fact. Denial won’t help you – you can’t just force the old normal back. People want to stay at home and work from home. The biggest problem is travel especially in India where there are endless traffic jams and crowded trains and busses. People want to avoid that and you won’t be able to change this scenario for the foreseeable future.
What we need to do is that the team sizes need to be reduced. Previously every 9-10 members used to have one manager or reporting head. This needs to change to 4-5 member teams. Lesser number of team members would mean lesser video calls and the chance of friendships to grow amongst a very small group of people. The chances of friendship will increase when there is a very small team. Companies need to think about it because till you get genuine friendship happening, your work quality will suffer. Having a small team will help in this aspect.
This will of course mean, the need for better middle managers. India over the last decade has faltered in this aspect. India struggled to develop genuine leaders in the corporate sector. Leaders need to create more leaders and it’s high time companies look into this aspect and develop a good leadership pipeline. Give opportunities to people who have a flair towards leadership – people who have empathy and people who care.
Having offsites once in a quarter is a must-have right now. You need to get your team members out of their homes – go to a different place for a couple of days and allow your team members to mingle and allow them to come up with ideas to help the organisation grow. Your team members will love you for this opportunity. Try it and see the transformation happening.
What do you think about how companies can overcome this creative bottleneck challenge?
What seems cheap is expensive! What’s perceived as expensive actually ends up being cheaper!
We talk long term but think short term!
I bought a flat a few years back and when I was doing the interiors my cousin who is an interior designer himself helped me in settling things for me! Getting an expert on my side was actually very helpful!
When we went to search for curtains, he took me to a showroom at Triangular Park (in Kolkata) and this shop had some awesome collections! But as you can realise it was very costly! I was not very sure of that purchase but my cousin told me to think long-term!
” You are already spending quite a bit in your interiors and this addition not only gives a better look, but it will also last a hell of a long time “! he said.
It’s been 5 years and my curtains are still hanging as if they are new!
My cousin was telling me that one of his customers was not ok to pay for expensive sets of curtains and they went for the curtains from their local shop! What happened was that in the next 3 years they had to change their curtains twice!
I see this happening a lot with people in India while changing their old tyres in four-wheelers! To save costs they sometimes go for refurbished tyres and sometimes they opt to change only two tyres! What happens then is that the two older tyres ensure that these new tyres get old quicker and within a year they have to replace 4 tyres!
In the share market, especially many newbies think buying shares of companies whose share prices are very high is “Expensive” and penny stocks are “Cheap“! The fact is good companies will cost you a premium but in the long run, the results and your wealth will be unimaginable!
What you think is cheap today will make you feel like a fool a few years later!
What you think is expensive today will turn out to be a great ” deal ” when you compare it a few years later!
Just like stock market investments, when you purchase any useful gadget think long-term. When you purchase an electronic gadget don’t settle for the lower-end model because one year later you might have to spend again! Better buy the top-of-the-shelf product which can give you long-lasting pleasure!
Please don’t mistake this post as if I am promoting things to buy on EMI! You should only buy things which you can afford and that could mean postponing your buying plan but don’t settle for stuff which will give pain in the future!
As the saying goes, short-term pain leads to long-term gain!
What’s your recent purchase where you thought long term and made the decision? Let’s share our experiences and learn from each other!
Inadvertently we are all selfish!
It’s because we care for ourselves! Nothing wrong with that! You should love yourself first before loving others!
But there is another side to it! When you start loving yourself you also have this in the back of your mind how do others validate us!
Say, for example, you love buying T-shirts! Now you go to a mall or Amazon to purchase some cool Tshirt s! You feel nice! But the next day when you wear it and no one says, “Wow you look great in that T-shirt ” you feel it was a wrong purchase!
Doing what you want to do should be your primary motivator – others validating or not should not be your criteria!
Recently I was talking to a friend and I was asking him why he was not active on social media! He said I don’t have many followers so what’s the point of being active! Why don’t one have many followers? What’s being active in social media means? You only want to cater to your wants but don’t want to cater to others’ wants?
We all are living and as we live we create stories! Every day some experience is happening in our lives. Be it at home or work or with friends and family! Every incident is a story!
You might think why should anyone be interested in my story! True, initially people won’t but you need to persist because the technique is to not only write for yourself or create content for yourself but also for people two rungs below you!
Say for example you are a manager in a company – you should generate content for juniors in your group who are two rungs below you! If you are new to college – generate content for people who are in class 10. If you are fresher in the IT industry – write content for juniors who will get into this industry couple of years later!
Every story has an audience and every story gets some connection! You need to first generate the content for that niche audience of yours and then distribute it to that target group!
If you are a coder who recently joined a company, write or talk about your experience in that industry! Talk about the challenges you face daily! Talk about the gap from college to a job! This will help your juniors to understand what’s in store for them! You will generate a fan following when you do that!
Social media creates a FOMO concept and you are always looking for validation! You are always expecting the influencers to engage with your content but that won’t happen because your journey and the influencer’s journey are treading separate paths!
Remember at any point in time you are an influencer! If you are the eldest son of the house your siblings look up to you as an influencer! You will find the younger siblings always trying to copy the elder ones! That’s in our genes because as I said we all are influencing someone or the other in our lives!
Don’t hold back in telling your story! I find Indian entrepreneurs talking a lot less about their stories! Very few actually open up on their struggles! Very few actually write about their failures! This is precisely why I have a lot of respect for Mr. Vaitheeswaran because he wrote Failing to Succeed! His ventures Indiaplaza and Fabmart were pioneers in Indian e-commerce but they didn’t reach the level where the current Ecommerce companies reached and he was game enough to write that story! What’s more, he took those learnings and started his new venture again! I guess that’s why he named it AGAIN – though he might not agree!
If we come forward and tell our story it will help the next generation because they will learn in advance the mistakes which they should not commit!
I find digital marketers struggling with story writing! But the fact is if you are a marketer then you should be confident to write! Copywriting is marketing! Copywriting is sales! Copywriting is everything today when it comes to branding and if we are not doing this correctly our brand equity will never rise!
Start building your personal brand! Your personal brand is your story! When you start doing that you will realise how many people will connect with you and open up with you and then together everyone will learn something new!
What’s holding you back? What’s your story?
When I started my career as a salesperson I found prospecting new customers as the hardest part of my role. I was an introvert by nature and talking with strangers was not my strength more so face to face. As days went by I learned the tricks of the trade and got better! But amidst all this, I found managing an account to be my mojo! Once the relationship is built I found it very comfortable to take the relationship to the next level! Being a good listener people got the vibe to talk with me pretty easily.
This made me think that account management is pretty cool. Well, it was cool till things turned awry one day when a customer went irated due to a bad service issue. Being friendly is good – helps you in getting more business easily via reference but it also means you are the man who would be caught first when things go wrong. That’s exactly what happened and unfortunately, it happened on a weekend! Communication in the year 2000 was not as easy as it is today! I didn’t have a mobile phone either. I was on my way to watch a movie with my friends and on the way met the customer and faced his wrath. Thankfully my boss had a landline at home and I called him up and he somehow arranged a serviceman to reach the location and gave him a spare battery! (I was into UPS sales at that time)
This incident made me realise what seems easy is not so easy. You as a salesperson can commit but to keep up to that commitment level is what will take your relationship further! Yes, problems can happen but how you solve those problems by keeping the customer’s interest in mind will enhance your reputation!
I learned two things that evening (I missed my evening movie too)
The problem in the service industry is that you can’t really control what your delivery team is going to serve to the client and hence you as an account manager can be sandwiched between the customer and the production team!
How do you come out of that situation:
Maintain healthy relationships
Be proactive! Be your client’s spokesperson inside your organisation! This might lead you to face awkward stares from your colleagues but your job is to keep your client happy! When your end goal is client satisfaction then nothing should stop you from ensuring that the goal is achieved!
Customers believe you and give you the order and relationships are built on trust! Now you as the account manager can’t destroy that trust! If you love your job then you will do everything in your capacity to ensure that the client is happy! Businesses are built on trust and once you gain that trust it’s on you to ensure that it’s not broken!
Competition is lurking around and the only way you can grow your business is by word of mouth marketing! Word of mouth marketing can only happen when your clients refer more businesses towards you without you prompting for them! Clients become your brand ambassadors when they are very happy with your services! You as an account manager play a vital role in ensuring that it happens and stays that way!
Account management is always a dual-edged sword because you are basically sandwiched between your production team and the client. It can be stressful but if you love your job and if you love servicing clients and if you want to make your clients happy then you have to accept this as part of your career growth! The best CXOs come through the account management route because this group of people takes care of two important pillars of the company’s success: people and clients!
A company thrives via PPC
P = People
P = Process
C = Customers
As account managers, you are directly coordinating with P and C and that makes you the ideal candidate to move into the next stage of career growth! Of course, that’s only possible if you do your job well!
As an account manager what gives you maximum happiness and what gets you stressed?
My email is open to questions and I look forward to interacting with you to understand your pain points and I hope to solve some or all of your queries!
Keep firing!
Most of the time it’s not your fault.
Most of the time you are not in control.
It’s up to you how you “react“ because that’s in your control!
Did we have any control over the pandemic? No.
Many people lost their lives! I personally went through multiple tragedies in the last 18 months! And I am sure millions across the globe went through similar emotions. Now it’s up to us to treat this as an excuse and blame our luck for anything wrong hereafter or you turn around with resilience to accept the bitter truth of fact and rebuild your life!
Lies we have been taught include that you do this and your life will be set! The fact is life is never set! As soon as you breathe easy, something will or might happen to change your life! Similarly, any tragedy is not the end of the world! You being alive is the biggest gift! Make use of it! Accept reality and get up and get going!
One of the biggest problems that I see people having is that they face tremendous difficulty to ask for help! The world is filled with good people and even when some remain silent just come forward and ask and you will see many hands coming forward to support you.
Nothing is permanent! We move on! Even after tremendous tragedy, I have seen people recover and find joy in life! You can’t stop living! You can’t stop breathing! We need to remember one thing that till we are alive we are supposed to work towards happiness!
When I was 10 years old, a cousin of mine who was 18 at that time passed away due to an accident! The lives of my uncle and aunt changed forever! For months they remained silent! I remember staying with them for more than a month at their house! Hardly anyone spoke but they started recovering. Naturally, life was never the same again but then their elder son got married and smiles were back in the family! Does that mean we didn’t remember our cousin on that day? Yes, we did remember him and still remember him but we learned to live without him. Then my nephew was born and normalcy returned!
God has strange ways to remind us who is the boss! The more you believe you are in control, the more he will show you that you have nothing in control!
If you look at social media you will feel everyone is having a cool life! Everyone is getting fantastic returns in the stock market! Everyone is building a start-up and everyone is successful and filled up with new business orders! But the fact is most are showing off! Social media is a great place to mask yourself! You can say anything and everything and become an influencer! You will find absolutely irrelevant posts and tweets and copycats having more than 50,000 followers! And you are thinking, “wow” how did he do that? But why are you thinking that way? Will your life change with that thinking? You need to love yourself and try to live a better life than yesterday! Be resilient and learn to live life on your terms! Work on something that makes you happy and try to gain freedom! Time is the biggest leverage! And it’s up to you how you utilise it!
Many times I have seen people trying to control others! Frankly, you can‘t! Parents trying to control their kids are the worst offenders because the seeds are sown right there! Learn to make your kids independent! Don’t make decisions on their behalf but when they ask, help them and guide them! They will ask for guidance only when they know that you don’t control them. It’s the same in a professional set up too! You can’t control your team members! You can only inspire them and guide them! If the alignment is not there then part ways but never try to control! It will always give disastrous results!
The problems that you have today will vanish tomorrow but can reoccur the day after tomorrow! But don’t let the anxiousness of tomorrow take away your happiness of today! Always bring your whole self to work and at home! People mix up things too much! And this work-from-home scenario has actually done more harm for many of the individuals! If you don’t have a caring support system at home then it can lead to a situation where you are always at home and always at work and finally, you are not satisfied anywhere!
You need to take the call what is best for you! But first, you have to accept the problem! When acceptance happens you will find a way to the solution.
The world is abundant with love and joy and you just need to tell yourself that you will live a life of fulfillment! It’s all inside you, it’s your belief that matters!
If you lie to yourself, it means you are denying the problem, and till you are in a state of denial nothing gonna change! You will always be frustrated because you are yet to find out your “why”.
I have seen people telling me that if I get X amount of money from next month I will be happy. Two problems:
First, that is not gonna happen.
Second, what are you going to do to make that happen!
If you believe in the second option then you will find a way for additional ethical income. As I said earlier the world is filled with opportunities but it’s up to you to go for it. Of course, it means you have to work doubly hard to reach there!
Nothing will come easily!
You need to pick up new skills to make yourself more worthwhile. That requires hard work! But you can do it! If you believe in yourself I am very sure you can achieve it!
Make your mind strong enough to face adversity and build your power of resilience so that you don’t break down when things go against you! God has something for everyone! But it’s upon us to find it and live a life of fulfillment and joy!
Are you ready?
Come on, be a man!
We have heard this dialogue before in many Indian movies!
Isn’t that sexist?
Means, come on – if you are emotionally hydrated then you, as a man, have to show that all is cool and put up a brave face! That’s what this dialogue is all about.
But we are humans. We are vulnerable. We can make mistakes. We can get into trouble. We can get hurt. We can lose someone very close to us. After this also chin up? Be a man?
I have a big problem with this dialogue! It’s like men can’t cry. Men can’t show vulnerable emotions! Why so?
And when we show something to the world – which is basically a makeup – then deep inside we are falling apart. This leads to depression. It’s not so simple. But the fact is that depression is for real.
And the worst thing others can do is by saying, “be a man” or “it’s fine, move on”. These people don’t understand that depression exists. The person sitting right beside you might be suffering. Look out!
That’s why it’s important that you talk. Just talk and let another person listen to you. You need close family members or friends to get out of this scenario. People don’t understand the emotions that depressed people go through during these times.
Everyone is not the same. Some people play it very well or act very well.
But from the inside, these so-called strong people are broken. Many are! So it’s important that you talk to your near and dear ones. If you have a problem – speak. If you don’t have a problem – speak. All problems don’t need a solution. Sometimes what the other person needs is someone to talk to. It gets easier when you discuss or talk to another person. Even when there are no immediate solutions you will see the heaviness of your heart reducing after a candid talk.
Don’t make life difficult! Don’t make negative comments. Don’t be toxic. What works for you might not work for others! What emotions you had can’t be equated to another person’s emotion in the same scenario. We are all different and it’s important that we respect that.
By not talking we complicate matters! Isn’t it so weird that 25 years back it was difficult to communicate with people staying far away? When I used to stay in a hostel, I could speak only once a week with my parents. STD calls were very costly those days! There were no mobile phones. Today when we can call or talk with anyone at any time due to technology innovations, we take it for granted. We take relationships for granted. Relationships need to be given time. You need to talk.
If you are in a happy space and you are not making the first move to talk to your near and dear ones regularly then the problem lies with you. The people who are in the depressed zone won’t come and speak to you but they are yearning to talk. So give them the ears!
Depression is for real folks. Treat it very seriously! If you lose a close relative or a friend due to depression then you will be cursing yourself for life. It would remain a lifelong regret! Don’t do it!
Whom are you calling now?
You are grumpy!
Your friend asks you what happened.
You say you are tensed because your son’s admission to college is round the corner and you are having difficulty arranging the money!
Sounds similar? Sounds familiar?
And then when your friend says don’t worry, something will come around. But it’s not so easy because it’s your problem and it’s difficult to take things so casually!
We have been told multiple times that life is not about money. Also, we have been told that money can’t buy you happiness! But the fact is money can’t buy you happiness in the actual sense but it does buy you food which you place on the table!
One of the biggest anxiety problems is the money problem.
If you have debt issues: You can’t be happy
If you have a health crisis in your family: You can’t be happy.
Though health comes before wealth, you can dry up your wealth in one unfortunate crisis! How will you be happy after that? Your future anxiousness will only take you far off from happiness!
So whether you like it or not, it’s important to solve your money problems to ensure happiness! Your basic needs should be well covered for you to even think of being happy!
How do you do it? It’s difficult, but the fun fact is that you can turn this around even if you are broken today.
Let’s go!
First, get a hang of all your spending.
Get rid of any spending which is not a need.
Control your wants. And save and invest the rest!
There is no way you can garner wealth if you have not invested in equities.
Equity investment doesn’t mean you buy any cheap stocks! Believe, it’s your business which you are buying to be a part of! Buy with the notion of holding on for at least 15 years! Do not buy based on tips or don’t get into FOMO!
If you want a secure future and a happy life you need to get rid of your anxiousness! It’s not easy in theory because if you have a money problem you can’t be happy. Anyone telling you otherwise, don’t care for you because it doesn’t happen that way!
You should have the habit of purchasing equity regularly. You should be proud of your investments!
If your debts are taken care of and you decide to live a life within your means then you will have a happy and joyful time with your family and a good night’s sleep. Very few can afford this.
If you can start living a life within 50% of your earnings from today, be pretty sure that in 10 years to 12 years’ time, you won’t be running around for money. But you have to patiently do this.
So what to do with the other 50%?
Break that up into 2 parts:
30% – Wants
20% – Investments.
In your “wants”, you can have your EMIs. That is the maximum you are allowed to spend in EMIs. By default 20% has to go into investments.
100 – Age
If you are 25 years of age, subtract 100 from your age, that’s 100-25 = 75. Now 75% goes into equities and 25% in liquid products which can be RD (Recurring Deposits), FD (Fixed Deposits) or Liquid funds, or any endowment products. I prefer liquid funds because they can be redeemed easily.
If you have debts that will run for more than 10 years, make sure that in your next raise, you will put that extra money in servicing those debts. Debts cripple you. So get rid of them at the earliest.
If you follow the above rules consistently, 10 years down the line, you won’t be working for money because now money will work for you. It will grow when you sleep and that means you will have true control of your time. When this happens, you can do what you want to do rather than being forced to do something which you are not passionate about.
Are you facing difficulty in managing to create your goals and maintaining them? If yes, connect with me over LinkedIn and we can have a chat. Always happy to help.
Till then, take care and God Bless!
Writing cold emails or writing your first email to a lead or to any influencer whom you want to reach out to, is one of the most undervalued skills in the world today.
Are you in that bad habit of writing anything for everybody? Have you changed your writing habits and styles over the past 5 years?
If you have not, then it’s time to change. I am very sure that the results of your emails must have fallen drastically in the last few quarters! Have you checked your data? No? Go and check it first.
Go to your email inbox and filter your emails based on the last 3 years and see the response rate. If you have not changed your style of writing I am very sure you will be shocked with your findings. You might be right now at less than 20% responses.
You might be a great writer. You might be very good at English but for people to respond to your first email needs much more than just good English skills. What are they? Let’s discuss this in detail.
Decades back when computers were yet to make an entry into our lives, it was the letters that were sent to decision-makers, pitching for services. Generally, those letters used to be filtered by the secretary, and only the good ones used to land on the decision maker’s table. Today this has been replaced by intelligent spam filters. So, as a seller, if you are sending similar types of emails to hundreds of people, the server will block you and your email will land in your target customer’s spam folder.
This is of course one aspect of the whole matter because everyone understands the importance of spam filters these days so they generally customise or personalise enough to bypass the spam filters. But that doesn’t guarantee you that your target customer will open the email. Hundreds of emails in my inbox today are lying unread so I am sure you won’t want to have a similar fate – won’t you?
People don’t read emails, they scan. To improve the open rate, you need to work on your subject lines. I only open emails when a subject line interests me. Try to be innovative but don’t take innovation too seriously. Just be yourself and keep the subject line simple and within 5-6 words. People generally check their emails first on their mobiles, so keeping a short subject line helps in viewability.
As I said above, people scan emails so though your short and crisp subject line might prompt your target customer to open the email, will he or she read through that whole email is still a question mark.
This is where your first two lines make or break your effort. If your targeted user likes your first two lines, he or she will then make the effort to read the rest of your email. Hence your first two lines should talk more about your targeted audience’s problems rather than boasting about yourself.
Flattering works well in most cases. If your targeted customer recently got an award or released a book or one of his talk shows/videos went viral – then start your email with that point. Everyone loves to hear good things about themselves so when you start your email on that note, you will get immediate attention. This will confirm that your email won’t be passed by and it will be read.
After you gain the attention of your reader, it’s important that you start talking about how your product or service is going to erase a pain point in the customer’s work or life. Don’t start talking about your features yet, mention how you have found out the problems that your client is facing in his business domain and follow that with the solution that your product or service is going to provide to fill that gap.
If you have researched well and the client does have a problem which he is eagerly looking forward to solving, then the customer will read the rest of the email. So if you have not done research properly, then you will fail to get any results.
Once the targeted customer has read your email up to this portion and has not closed his email, then next he would like to know more about your offer.
You may give a gist of the features of your solution, or you can give a link to your website where everything is written in detail.
Ideally, this is your CTA (Call to Action) or you may prompt your reader to reply to the email to know more details.
Whatever is comfortable for you but you need to prompt your reader to do something after reading the email. Either he or she should reply back to learn more or your email should take them to your website. In both cases, it’s a conversion for you and your email gets its desired results.
Research has shown that the human mind gets attracted to content which talks of numbers. So when you are writing about your solution, make sure that you throw in some interesting numbers. For example: “Over the last 12 months, 75% of our clients have come from your region or your country and they have already received 100% ROI. If you wish, I can share their detailed contact details for your perusal“.
These numbers will immediately rouse his or her interest and they will be prompted to take action (either reply to you or visit your website for more details)
Follow-Ups is one of the most underrated traits in successful sales.
“There is ample chance that I like what I read but because I am busy I could not respond“.
Today we are all living a very fast-paced life and with 100s of emails hounding us every day, it’s quite possible for us to forget about “that” email to which I wanted to respond to. This could be the case with any of your clients.
Hence, following up is the salesperson’s duty and it should be done diligently. I suggest the Fibonacci sequence for follow-ups.
What is a Fibonacci sequence?
A Fibonacci sequence is a series of numbers where the next number is found by adding up the two numbers preceding it.
0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21 is a Fibonacci series of numbers.
So, Day 0 is the day when you send the first email. Give a gap of one day and then shoot your first follow-up. Then another gap of one day for the next follow-up. After this give a gap of two days, then three days and then 5 days. The follow-ups can be through multiple channels. It need not be always via email if you have your customer’s WhatsApp or skype details.
But follow up you must and it’s equally important that when you follow up, you follow the same principle of personalising your emails or calls.
As a final shot, please remember that no one is obligated to respond to you, and you as the email sender need not be frustrated if the conversion doesn’t happen. Remember, Rome was not built in a day. You need to be patient. Consistency, patience, and persistence are the keywords that you should swear by and they will lead you to success.
A book that is highly recommended for writing cold emails is, How do I write this email by Danny Rubin. It’s worth the investment if you truly want to master the game.
Do you write cold emails?
What’s the strategy you follow?
What has been your success rate?
P.S. You can test your skill by sending customised and personalised connection requests to a few of your targeted customers over LinkedIn and check out your conversion ratio. It’s a good place to start cold emailing.
We are strongly wired to our beliefs. So much so that we find it hard to accept our wrong beliefs. We hold our pre-conceived beliefs close to our hearts and try valiantly to not accept the facts when we are wrong.
But, the fact of the matter is we can’t be right on everything. Human beings have evolved over the years by accepting past wrongs, learning about new discoveries, accepting them, and moving forward.
Think about this:
Many years ago, we believed that the earth was flat. Then one day it was proved beyond any doubt that Earth in fact is round in shape. There was resistance to believe this new theory and hence it was commonly accepted many years later. But the fact is a majority of the population accepted the earlier mistake and changed their beliefs. Without acceptance, this new discovery wouldn’t have got the necessary approval.
Then, there was this belief that the Sun moves around the Earth. Once again it was proved many years later that the earlier thought process or the earlier learnings were wrong. Once again, people discarded the wrong knowledge and accepted the new learning and humanity progressed.
Only when you accept that your past learning was wrong, then only you will be able to learn and accept new findings. This is a fact and no one can deny this.
Recently I was having one of my evening walks at my terrace with my 7-year-old daughter in tow. She has this habit of turning a teacher once in a blue moon and that day she asked, “OK, Papa, answer this. How many planets do the solar system have”?
I said, “9”.
My daughter (remember, she is a teacher now) – with both hands at the side of her waist (forming a teacup) gave me a stern look.
I acted in bewilderment.
“What happened”?, I asked.
“Come on, Papa. You are wrong. There are only 8 planets in our solar system”.
I said, “OK name them”.
She started, “Mercury, Venus…ending with Neptune”.
I said, “what happened to Pluto”.
“Pluto is not a planet, Papa”. She said. “It’s a dwarf planet”.
I said, “But in my school, they taught me we had 9 planets with Pluto being the 9th one”.
Now it was her turn to show bewilderment.
She said, “Do one thing give me your mobile, I will show you on YouTube”. I opened YouTube and gave it to her and then she took out the video where it showed that the solar system has 8 planets.
I patted her head and said, “good”. See your father learned something new today.
She was happy knowing that.
I continued, “as you grow up, never accept anything at face value be it from your parents or from anyone else. Because we all are human beings and we might be wrong too. But don’t argue just for the sake of argument or don’t think that you are always right. Whenever you feel anyone, is saying something which you think is wrong, bring out the facts (like showing the YouTube video) and prove it. Don’t argue without data and similarly do not accept just because someone senior tells you something. Have the belief in yourself to validate it”.
If our children are taught that whatever we say is right then they will never venture out to find out what could be true. From our childhood, we are taught not to argue with seniors. Accept whatever the teachers are saying without questioning. I believe this is wrong. Because as parents we should teach our children to try and discover new things. Explore the unknown and when he or she thinks that another person has spoken something which is against his or her learnings or values, then stand up and give your inputs.
This is how they will learn to question – this is how they will explore the truths.
In life and at work we should follow the same example. When you are meeting with your boss or colleagues, you should question when you think the point raised is against your beliefs. By accepting whatever is being told even when you know it is wrong, you will never be able to be happy at work.
I can understand there are bosses who do not like their subordinates to question them or challenge them. That’s the signal of a toxic culture. If your boss does not accept the challenges or do not accept the wrongs then the team will become a band of “yes men”. And when you are surrounded by “yes men” sooner rather than later, the organization will end up making some big mistakes that could take years to rectify or could never be rectified.
As leaders, we should be flexible. We should give confidence to our team members that we could be wrong. We should allow them to criticize us openly. It’s much better that they criticize you openly than they talking about you or laughing about you at your back. When they criticize you, as a leader you need to accept their thought process, see what’s going wrong, and make sure you change the situation.
Your team members look up to you. You are a celebrity for them. So when they see that their leader accepts the mistake and makes changes, they will get emboldened to question you openly when they feel something is wrong in the organization.
A great company is built by a great team. You can’t build an organization alone. But if you are surrounded by yes men then in effect you are alone running the show. In the long run, your company’s growth will stagnate.
Allow people to question your beliefs and when they bring data to the table, accept the wrongs, appreciate their inputs and make changes to your plans based on these new facts. When your team sees that their inputs have been accepted and they see that their leader appreciating such inputs and putting their ideas into action – you will be able to build a company where there is fewer gossips, fewer politics, and more accountability.
Are you allowing yourself to be questioned?
Are you accepting your mistakes?
Are you learning and growing?
Let’s discuss!
We love to get validation. But the problem is, once you are dependent on validation for your ideas and decisions, you stop being yourself!
We love to show off. You put a comment against an influencer’s post – the influencer likes or shares or comments on that. Next, you take that as your bragging right and show off on social media, and people around you go “ga-ga”. This is a complex which is to be best avoided because now you will go after the vanity matrix. You will soon lose your originality.
We deem ourselves to be powerful when what you say, good, bad, or ugly is shared by your “yes men” across their communities! You get a false notion that you are someone great, though there could be more naysayers whom you are not aware of. You soon get cocooned in your island! You stop growing!
When you build a community of yes men, you stop failing (in your mind) because the yes men are always saying yes. No one is there to point out the mistakes. When you stop making mistakes, hubris sets in and your fall begins.
You are fearful that you will lose your position if people don’t say that you are right. You don’t love criticism. Under criticism, you are always defensive. You give excuses that are all external. These are all signals that you are fearful and when fear rules, you stop innovating – you stop thinking positively – you only think how you can be perceived in a different light.
With yes men around you there is no criticism and a false notion is created that you are not fearful. You are trying to send wrong signals to your brain and the real “fearful you” remains hidden while the world sees a confident man. This is prevalent in social media and that’s why having validation in social media can be very dangerous! If you are fearful, write down your fears. People love to interact with genuine people. All of us are vulnerable and there is no harm in accepting the truth.
You have 1000 followers or you lead a team of 100 people. You are the manager and you wish to become VP in two years! You can have a desire but when desire turns into greed, you will do things that will be unethical just like having 20 yes men who put pressure on your behalf to the senior management to see you go and grab the VP post! I recently saw a person having a bio, stating that he is a Padma Shri nominee – now what on earth is that and the guy is 21-22 years old. People write anything on social media and the funny part – the guy has close to 2000 followers. God save these kids – I guess staying at home for so long has taken our creativity to a different level. We have started fantasizing too much.
So don’t build a community of yes men. Build a community where people can express themselves genuinely. Allow yourself to be criticized. I see people deleting comments when they are criticized! Why so? Everyone has their point of view. You can delete if the language is obscene or crossing the line or going too personal. But the problem is that as you build your community, you feel you are someone great because so many people are saying yes and good to you and this leads to a false notion of greatness.
You don’t say yourself to be great – you don’t beat your own drum. Leave that to others! Most of us here, is a work in progress. Many of us are still searching for our own “why”! Many are still grappling with the reason for their existence so with whatever you can, help others to reach their goals. When you help others without expectations you can very well see your community is building around you!
You don’t become an influencer overnight. The people who are influenced by you will keep increasing as you keep growing! But stay grounded, stay humble, control your anger and if you have been able to achieve something in life then share and pay it forward!
The happiness of helping others is something which I can never express because it comes from inside!
A few questions to end this post with:
Are you surrounded by Yes Men?
Are you criticizable?
Are you growing realistically?
Are you happy?
I am looking out for your answers and interacting with you further on this topic.
Stay Safe! Stay Happy!